Raw

by remembertoexhale

I don’t really want to be
within your reach
just as you keep me far away so often
this time I want you to feel the distance
and dream about me all day and all night
and at four am when you can’t sleep, I want you to hold your pillow
wishing it were me
and when you drink your morning cup of coffee
wishing as you bring it to your mouth
that you could drink me up instead
and whenever you play a chord that’s a sharp minor seventh
you’ll remember when I told you it was my favourite
I hope that you’ll be miserable
and I want your heart to ache so hard that you have to stop what you’re doing
for a minute to catch your breath and refocus
and when you see me in a picture with another man
I want you to shake with rage
and your face to burn with
anger, hate and humiliation
and at that point you will remember that I would never cry in front of you.
when you’re driving in your car around five pm
and you have to pull the visor down
you will remember that that is my favourite time of the day
when the sun’s giving its last punch before dying to the moon
I hope that when you see any facial piercing
you will immediately see my mischievous smiling face
right before yours
wishing that it really was there for you to touch and hold
and you could grab me too close and kiss me like you mean it
and most of all
I hope that whenever you read a poem
you will hear my voice singing it softly
and that it will bring you back to me

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